Healthy Love

The path to love often travels unexpected terrain, revealing God's perfect timing only in hindsight. What appears as detours—painful endings, seasons of healing, and solitary growth—become essential chapters in a greater story. In Jody's journey, we witness how the courage to confront brokenness doesn't guarantee a perfect marriage, but cultivates the wisdom to recognize authentic connection when it emerges. Her story reminds us that God's orchestration unfolds not according to our timelines, but precisely when our hearts have been prepared to receive what once seemed impossible.

Jody's healing journey began in 2015 while she was pregnant with her daughter London. Though still married, she started to recognize the deep problems in her relationship. At the recommendation of a friend, she joined an inner healing group with other women.

"I had a friend invite me, and things were so miserable and lonely in my marriage, I was hungry for anything that was life-giving," Jody explains. "It was Holy Spirit led, which was truly transformative for me." This group helped her recognize her own unhealthy patterns—particularly her tendency toward control in her marriage.

Later, she started working with a life coach who challenged her perspective that her husband was solely responsible for their problems. "She really helped me see that it takes two people to contribute to the dysfunction in a relationship—even if it’s 95/5—we all play a part," Jody recalls. 

The paradox Jody discovered was that her healing actually intensified their marital problems. "When one person starts to get healthy, the connection changes," she explains. "What I started to see was that it began to make things worse. As I became healthier, I was no longer willing to enable unhealthy patterns."

She understood marriage as a dance: "If you change your dance steps, then they have to change their dance steps too." But she hadn't considered a third option: "they could also just stop dancing altogether." Despite her efforts to transform their dynamic, her partner ultimately wasn't willing to join her in the healing process. The music had stopped.

By 2020, Jody had reached a crossroads and a conversation with her therapist proved pivotal: "Your daughters will look for someone to love them the way that they see their father loving their mother. Your son will love their future wife the way that they see their father loving their mom."

This insight transformed her thinking. "Until that point, I was willing to sacrifice my mental health and well-being for the sake of keeping our family together. I didn't realize that either way, there were going to be casualties," she admits.

In the summer of 2020, Jody asked for a 60-day separation. "For me, it wasn't manipulation," she clarifies. "Some people threaten separation to get their partner to do what they want. I did not want my spouse to have short-term behavior modification due to a threat of divorce. The problem is people can white-knuckle anything for a short time, but it is not sustainable long term."

After witnessing that nothing was changing, she filed for divorce in October 2020. The process dragged on for almost a year and a half, finalizing in January 2022. During this difficult season, her faith became her anchor. "My song to get me through that season was ‘Jireh,’” reminding her that in every circumstance, she has enough because she has the Lord. 

At 39 years old with four children, Jody faced a new reality and new questions: Would she ever remarry? Would anyone find her desirable again? Would someone accept not just her, but her children?

"I wanted someone to look at my kids as a bonus and not baggage," she explains. "Not as 'Oh, they just come with Jody, unfortunately.'"

Sitting poolside with a friend who asked about her thoughts on remarriage, Jody laughed. "I think it's probably about ten years away." She laid out her plan: establish her parenting coaching career, get financially stable, find a rhythm with her kids, and then perhaps love would enter the picture.

Throughout this period, Jody was developing her ministry focused on parenting. "I knew what made my heart come alive was parenting," she shares. "I was feeling the Lord pulling on my heart saying, 'This is what I've called you to be. I've called you to be a voice in the parenting space to encourage and support other parents on their journeys.'" Dating was not a concern of hers. 

A few months after her divorce, Jody had an unexpected encounter on a flight to Los Angeles. "This man approached me after we got off the plane and said he had noticed me. We chatted for a few minutes and he asked for my number.” Later that week, they met up for dinner.

"It felt good to be wanted and desired," Jody admits. But her healing journey had equipped her with new discernment. "He was deeply unhealthy. Going out with him was fun, but he was clearly not my person," she reflects.

While he expressed attraction to her, his communication was inconsistent and game-like once they both got back to Nashville. This brief experience would later serve as a crucial comparison point when authentic connection entered her life.

In August 2022, Jody noticed someone named Jonathan had been watching her Instagram stories. She recognized him as they had both attended the same marriage conference in 2015, where Jody had been one of the speakers, though they hadn’t formally met at the time.

Their connection began simply enough—Jonathan responded to one of her parenting stories on Instagram. A few days later, while Jody was decorating her daughter's birthday cake, he messaged again about his own daughter's upcoming birthday. They messaged throughout the weekend, moving from direct messages in Instagram to text messages.

"On Monday we were texting throughout the day and into the evening," Jody remembers. “Later that night he asked, 'Would you like to just hop on the phone?' I agreed." That first call lasted three hours and fifteen minutes.

"It was such a breath of fresh air," Jody says. "There was an instantaneous comfort, an unusual ease between us." After that call, she wrote in her journal, "Did I just speak to my future husband tonight?"

What struck her immediately was Jonathan's directness compared to her previous experiences with passive communication. "He was very straightforward with me. He said, 'I'm not 19 anymore. I don't just date casually.' He told me directly that he was interested in me. It was refreshingly honest."

From the beginning, they confronted their geographical challenge head-on: Jody in Tennessee, Jonathan in North Carolina. "We quickly addressed the reality. I was in Tennessee with my children and couldn't relocate."

What kept her in the relationship was Jonathan's response: "A year or two ago, my ex asked if I'd be willing to move to Nashville since she has family there. There could be a possibility of us coming to Nashville."

This was exactly what Jody needed to hear. "It gave me the green light that I needed to keep exploring things with Jonathan,," she explains. “That kind of thing really matters when you have kids. If a relationship gets serious, you can’t just pick up and move—kids and ex-spouses act as anchors to your current location. But God knew exactly what I needed to hear to keep moving forward with Jonathan, instead of writing him off over geography."

For three weeks, they built their connection entirely through text messages, phone calls, and FaceTime. "That's what made our relationship special," Jody explains. "We had hours of talking because that's all we could do. We couldn't watch movies together or share physical space. We had to genuinely communicate."

They covered everything from how they handled anger to their contributions to their previous marriages ending. They discussed potential deal-breakers and past struggles. Jody was direct about her concerns and questions and nothing was off-topic between the both of them.

When they finally met in person three weeks after their first conversation, Jody recalls, "I remember going down from my apartment in the evening and meeting him in the parking lot. We immediately embraced. We were both nervous and excited, but it felt so right."

Their relationship progressed with remarkable speed. A month after their first meeting, Jonathan met Jody's children. The next month, she traveled to North Carolina and met his daughter and family. During that visit, they spontaneously went ring shopping. In January 2023—exactly one year and one day after her divorce was finalized—they got engaged. Three months later, they married.

In total, they had been physically together only five times before getting engaged and just three more times before the wedding. This timeline raised concerns among some who were outside of Jody’s inner circle. "Some people just didn’t get it. They get this idea of what a dating timeline should or shouldn’t be and unless they’re you, it’s hard to truly understand.”

Throughout this whirlwind relationship, Jody experienced moments of doubt. "I was afraid at times, wondering: Is he putting on a front? Is he love bombing me? Is who I'm experiencing actually who he is?" Later, as things continued to progress beautifully, her questions shifted: "Is this too good to be true? God, are you going to pull the rug out from under me?"

In these moments of uncertainty, she turned to prayer. "I just kept seeking the Lord and kept moving forward in my relationship with Jonathan watching and waiting for any red flags. And God was saying, 'No, this is who I have for you. He is a good man. He's a good father. He loves Jesus.'"

Nearly two years into marriage, Jody and Jonathan still live in different states—an arrangement necessitated by their complex family situations. When people express sympathy, Jody's perspective is pragmatic and spiritually grounded: "It's different from most marriages, but what's the alternative? To not have this love and support in my life? God knew that this was how things were going to look right now and it’s really okay. There has been so much grace over everything."

Despite the unconventional setup, Jody has found in Jonathan what she once thought impossible—a partner who is willing to dance with her in marriage. "We have disagreements and conflicts, because we’re human. I still see my old wounds emerge sometimes. Yet it’s incredible to have a teammate who is in it with you and willing to pause, examine himself, own his part, apologize, and work towards reconnection and building a stronger marriage."

One other detail the Lord worked out so beautifully was the topic of possibly growing their family. “Jonathan had said he always wanted more kids," Jody explains. "I asked him directly if he wanted biological children of his own. His response was simply, 'Your kids are enough.'" For a woman who had once feared her children would be seen as baggage rather than a bonus, these four simple words erased mountains of uncertainty. What she had considered her greatest liability in finding love again had become, in Jonathan's eyes, the fullness of family he had always wanted.

For Jody, their story demonstrates God's faithfulness beyond human expectations. "In our limited human thinking, it can feel impossible that someone exists who meets my hopes, my non-negotiables—and even things I didn’t know to hope for! And yet, I got someone who loves the Lord, is Spirit-filled, has done their own healing work, desires me, and genuinely wants my children too. That felt too good to be true, but here God is looking at me saying, 'Am I not the one who says I'm going to give you hope and a future? Am I not the one who says I can take anything and make it good for those who love Him?'"

Her journey stands as compelling evidence that God's timeline, while rarely matching our own, unfolds with perfect precision. What seemed impossible—finding a partner who embodied everything she needed while fully embracing her children—materialized against all statistical odds. As Jody and Jonathan often remind themselves, "You didn't think I existed, and I didn't think you existed. But here we are"—living proof that faith's quiet persistence ultimately bears fruit beyond what we dare to hope for.